Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

So while Dennis and I were back and forth to the hospital, life continued at as close to normal for everyone else, and a lot was going on.

The middle school had a special honor roll assembly, and both Alex and Nathan were recognized.  I missed it, of course, but I was there in spirit, and they both know how proud I am of them.

Nathan got a gold award with a GPA of 3.86.  Can you believe he missed straight A's by one B+?

Next time, for sure, Nate.  Not bad for his first quarter in middle school.

Alex got a Silver Award for his GPA of 3.71.  He, too, only missed straight A's by one grade.  We are so proud of him, as it took a lot of hard work on his part to make those grades.

Alex also got another another very special Character Counts Award for Responsibility.  That fits Alex to a T.  He is extremely responsible with his homework and schoolwork.  He comes right home, shows me what he needs to do, then gets right to work.  He is organized - something he did not inherit from his mother, and works so hard.  I am so proud of him, and am grateful that a teacher recognized this trait in him and recognized him for it.

Also, Caleb had an Indian pow-wow in his Kindergarten class on Tuesday.  I was absolutely exhausted Monday after getting home from the hospital.  When I found out Caleb needed an Indian vest for the next morning, I was ready to just cut arm holes in a brown paper bag and call it good.  But Caleb was less than thrilled by that idea, so I pulled myself up by the bootstraps, and helped him make his own Indian vest with a scrap of faux suede I dug out of the garage.  He decorated it with Indian symbols.  He was thrilled with it. He wanted to wear it to bed and was so excited to go to the pow-wow.  Now I am so glad that just I made the effort to do that for him.  I know I would have regretted it if I hadn't.  The whole world doesn't come to a screeching halt because one kid is sick.

There was also a belt test for taekwando while I was away.  Caleb got his orange belt, Dennis got his senior green belt, and Nathan got his red belt, which is a really big deal.  Dylan would have received his red belt too, if he wasn't tied up in a hospital recovering from surgery.  Poor Dylan.  He'll be up and kicking soon enough.  Unfortunately I have no pictures of the belt test, since I wasn't there to take them, but I am proud of my guys, and I know they did great!

Goodbye, Sir

This has been such a sad week for our family.  We just found out that our wonderful Martial Arts instructor, Mr. Muchenje, is leaving due to circumstances beyond his control.  I took these pictures at Caleb's last Tiny Tigers class with Mr. Muchenje.  Notice Caleb is the only one punching with his left hand.  Oh well.

 What a darling group of little boys these are.  Mr Muchenje, or Sir, as we call him, is so incredibly good with those little guys.  It is so fun to watch him work with them, and they have all come a long way.

As a special treat at the end of class, he let all the boys break a board.  Believe me, breaking boards is about as good as it gets!  (I'd rather break a board than eat chocolate, and that's saying something.)

Tough Guys!

The other boys had their last class with Mr. Muchenje on Friday, but the pics didn't come out.  This is not the end of Taekwondo for the VanBuskirks, but it is the end of an era.  A new teacher starts on Monday, and it will be interesting to see what that is like.  But the boys just love Mr. Muchenje, and are just sad about losing him.  

I am more devastated about this than the boys or Dennis are.  I have been through this before.  Mr. Muchenje's wife, Kylee was my original instructor.  I was so nervous and uncomfortable when I walked into my first women's only class, but she was amazing.  She built up my confidence and was an incredible teacher.  She just had a way of explaining things so you knew exactly what to do, and a way of making you feel like you could do it. She was MY instructor, and I trusted her completely.  She also became a dear friend in the process.  

Then, last spring, she was suddenly gone.  She got a job out of town, and she couldn't teach our class anymore. I was simply heartbroken, and so was she, I think.  I simply don't do well with change.  I wondered if I would continue on with martial arts, or if I should just quit.  I stayed.  Her husband, Farai, took over the class.  It was a woman's only class, and I think he was more nervous about taking it over than we were.  I had always liked him, but SHE was MY teacher, and this loyalty thing made it hard to jump over to a new teacher.  I am so glad I did though.  Although he has a different philosophy and teaching style than his wife, I found that I really liked his way too. He was really into self-defense, which I think is great.  I think it has been good for me to have been trained by both, because I have had balanced, well rounded instruction.   I consider them both MY instructors now.

So the news of his leaving has hit me just as hard.  The idea of a strange new teacher completely stresses me out, not to mention that I will REALLY miss them as friends.  I think that if I wasn't so far along in my training, I'd probably be calling it quits right now.  But Kylee and Farai had worked hard to convince me that a black belt really is attainable, and I finally started believing them.  Now that it seems like something I can really do, this happens. 

 I have been struggling with this question all week, and I have decided that I really do want to get my black belt - only I want to get it from MY instructors, the Muchenjes.  Period.  I just can't picture it any other way.  Who you get your belt from is really important in martial arts, both to the student and to the teacher.  If I get my black belt  from them I honor them.  They are thrilled with my decision, and I am honored that they are willing to work with me.  It will be tough.  It will mean long-distance, infrequent instruction with them, a lot of training on my own and with a few of the other gals who are almost there as well.  It will be a challenge, I know, but it will make it all the more rewarding in the end when Kylee or Farai (or both) ties that belt around my waist.  I love those guys, and I am determined to do this for them...and for myself, of course

Meanwhile, I think I'll mourn just a bit longer.  

Going for the Brown

While the Lopezes were going for the gold over in Beijing, the VanBuskirks were going for the brown, green, and blue with a brown stripe.

Last night six of us had a taekwondo belt test.  Dennis and Alex tested for green belts, Derek tested for senior blue belt, and Dylan, Nathan, and I tested for brown.  Caleb has a yellow belt, but he didn't test this time.  Luke has yet to get his white belt.

The test started out tough for me.  I had to do 55 push ups, stopping and holding push up position between each ten while reciting the Ten Rules of Life (they are like the Young Women values for martial arts - effort, etiquette, character, sincerity, self-control, respect, humility, confidence, discipline, integrity - sir!  Interesting how the YW values and the 10 Rules of Life both end with "Integrity."  We should make the young women recite the YW theme while doing push-ups like that.)  It was brutal!!! No pics of me doing that.  I have them, but you can't see them.

Then we had to show our Poomse, or forms.

Alex and Dennis punching for their forms.

Derek did a great job on his form.

Nathan and Mom testing for forms together.

Then came the part I feared the most - sparring.  I dread it because of the ridiculous gear I have to wear - oh, and the fact that I can get killed!

Derek lets is opponent have it with a side kick.

Nathan attacks his opponent mid-air.

The men fight with so much power!  Dennis insteps right to the chest.

Alex with a nice high kick.  Way to go Al!

It is SO FUN watching Dylan spar.  He is everywhere and non-stop - and so very serious.  Here is is fighting a much higher belt - no problem.  Nice kick to the head.

 Yes, this is me going for a head shot against my friend Bo.   She is shorter than me (who isn't?), but she is a higher belt and TOUGH as nails!  She intimidates me.  But thanks to my long legs I was able to hold my own, and had fun doing it.

Then came everybody's favorite part of a belt test - breaking boards!  There is such satisfaction in hearing that board crack and feeling your foot go through it!  It is something everyone should try - it is such a confidence booster.

Dylan finishes off his jumping spin hook in style.

Look how high off the ground Dennis gets with his jumping front kick.  The instructor couldn't hold the board high enough.

 OK.  I can't believe I am putting this online for all to see, but here is my spin hook.  I don't know how my technique looks, but I think my hair looks great, and that's really what I was going for.

Now ladies, admit it, doesn't that look like fun?  That's why I am always running off at the end of enrichment.  Women's only class: Tuesdays and Thursdays 8:30 pm.  Put the kids to bed and come.  I'm telling you - If this gangly, awkward, mom can do this, anyone can.

Group photo after the test.  Everyone did such a great job.  I was so proud of all my guys!

So now I am a brown belt.  For those of you who don't know the belt system, on a scale of 1 (white) to 12 (black), brown is a 9, so it is considered a high belt.  If you would have told me 2 years ago that I'd be a brown belt, I would have thought you were bonkers.  I used to watch the brown belts in awe, and now I can hardly believe that I am one.  I never thought I'd get this far, but I just kept working hard and having fun, and now here I am.  Maybe if I keep at it I can become a black belt someday after all.  Maybe we all can.  But that is easier said than done.  One belt at a time.  Next belt - Red.  I love red!  It's my favorite color, after pink (surprisingly, they don't have a pink belt in taekwondo.  Go figure.)

They say that brown is the new black - but I don't think that applies to taekwondo.

Family photo with Farai and Kylee Muchenje, our wonderful instructors. 

 Why do we do it?  Well, to quote the Visa commercial about the Lopezes at the Olympics:

"The family that punches, dodges, blocks, throws, and roundhouse kicks together...stays together."

Kickin' it at the Beach

Last week our Martial Arts school took our kicks and high energy to the beach.  

We made a short stop in Riverside to visit the beautiful garden of our instructor, Farai Muchenje.  We have been hearing about his garden for so long, and we weren't disappointed.  He loves his garden and drives all the way to Riverside almost everyday to work on it. He has worked so hard, and has so many plans.  It was amazing - a tropical paradise in the middle of a barren landscape.  Well done, Mr. Muchenje!

The kids each got a chance to throw a ninja star into a tree stump.

 Of all the kids, only Alex and Nathan got their stars into the stump.  Maybe we should invest in a few ninja stars - NOT!

A group picture in the garden before hitting the road.

We drove to Crystal Cove State Beach on the Newport coast.  It was a great beach with relatively few people.  We set up our shade structures and gave the kids the boundaries - right in front.  The kids were all so good.  They all stayed right where they were told, and they all played so nicely together - all ages, boys and girls - with no problems at all.  I was so proud of how good everyone was.  They are well trained, obviously. 

Just a cute picture of Luke.

Later we got down to business.  First there was the throw each other our of the big circle game.  Derek was one of the last two standing.  Then they did some soft sword fighting.

And of course a bit of board breaking.  I think the kids got a kick out of it!

Kiap gang!  What a day!

Who We Are

When people ask about our children we can say that we have three of each, three blonds and three brunettes, that is. But in the gender department we have chosen to specialize in boys ( and we make them pretty good too.) Yes, we do boys, that's what we do. All boys, all the time. Alex, Nathan, Derek, Dylan, Caleb, and Luke. It has a nice rhythm to it, don't you think. (You should hear how it sounds being yelled!)

In her book "The Parenting Breakthrough", Merilee Boyak suggested families specialize in about three activities, and that becomes part of the family's identity. Well we are the taekwondo, scouting, piano family.

Several years ago we did all the sports in season - everybody does - soccer, basketball, baseball, etc. But we got to the point when we had kids on 4 different teams, with Dad coaching two of them. We were at the park every weeknight, and all day on Saturday, waiting for one child at a time to practice or play. We never ate dinner together anymore or got to spend time together on weekends. And the older our kids got, the longer the seasons lasted, and started flowing into one another. It was chaos, and it wasn't working for our family. We began to realize how crazy it was to split up and play on different teams when we have our own team right here. We needed something to bring our family together instead of pulling us apart. So I am a soccer mom no longer - now I am taekwondo mom. How cool is that! We discovered martial arts, and it has been such a great blessing for our family and our family-ness. We can do it all together-Dad, Mom, and brothers. The schedule is completely flexible, we can skip on busy days, and double up classes on days when we have more time. And there are never classes on Saturday, so our weekends are always ours! It turned out to be just what our family needs. We practice together, help each other grow at their own pace, learn about respect, self-control, and character development. Oh yeah, and the boys love all that kicking and screaming!


Scouting is a given, of course. We currently have 2 cubs (bears both), 2 scouts (star & tenderfoot), and a scout leader (eagle). In fact Dad, Alex, and Nathan left for scout camp on Fiesta Island, San Diego yesterday. (In just nine short years they can all go to camp, and I can have the week to myself - I am already making plans!) The whole scouting thing was crazy and confusing at first, and every year of cubs is different, but now we've got it down. This is where gender specialization comes in handy. Mom does cubs. Dad does scouts. The boys love it, and are learning and trying so many exciting and interesting new things, and accomplishing something at the same time. Whenever that boys complain of being bored, I say, "pull out your scout book."



Piano is on mom's insistence. They whine about it sometimes, but Shari Thatcher is the best teacher in the world and when they get to play song from Star Wars or Sponge Bob, they love it. After so many years is it just so nice to spontaneously hear real and lovely music being played in our home. It makes it all worthwhile!


Of course, the boys have a few individual things that they like too do, but these three activities pull us together as a family, and give us an identity and common purpose. Of course our only true common purpose is to work together to serve our Lord, Jesus Christ. We have a 10 foot long saying on our family room wall -"As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. Joshua 24:15." We consider our home a F.M.T.C. (Future Missionary Training Center) and are working very hard to prepare these boys for the service they will give the Lord on their missions and throughout their lives. VanBuskirks always follow the prophet. Always.

That is who we are. We are the taekwondo, scouting, piano family that always follows the prophet.